It’s amazing what the body can do when the mind is in the zone. Virtually the entire time at karate was spent by me repeating to myself, I can DO this… I CAN do this. It was a mental struggle for me but I overcame it. I think I’m getting closer and closer to the end of my rope; I really hope I can get my leg surgerized soon.
Witnessing my own deterioration is rather character-building, I must admit. I view that I have two choices – I can either give into despair, or challenge myself to succeed (without damaging my bones, of course). It’s truly amazing how you can discover wells of personal strength you never really knew you possessed…until it flourishes to your very being.
I survived both classes today, I’m proud to announce. But the neat thing was when I walked out the dojo door, I noticed for the first time the big huge tree on the other side of the street. The wind was picking up something fierce, and the leaves/branches were whipping back and forth with great intensity. BOOM! I was transported back to my college days, when I walked the golf course during a hurricane (betcha you weren’t expecting that!) – I had become one with the passion and fury of nature and simply gave myself up to the experience.
It reminded me of how when I was 14 years old, I used to roam the forests and lands around my home with my dog Buddy (a german shepard collie mutt, named for the first Seeing Eye dog back in 1927). When emotions got tough to deal with, I used to “go to ground” in nature; I’d listen to the secrets whispered by the pines and learn the wisdom of the winds. Fierce buffeting winds never frightened me; instead I saw my soul commune with the nature around me.
And now, decades later…I find myself still returning to my roots. After coming home from karate and seeing how the wind picked up, I decided to do my circle walk one last time….and became one with the winds whistling through the trees. Gosh it was cold, but my soul was quieted and calmed.
I can DO this. I can, and I will.
You see, when the going gets tough and you want to give up, you simply have to repeat to yourself, I can DO this, and perhaps, courage consists of hanging on, one minute longer. And then after that, one minute more. And another minute, and another… and soon you’ll see you have overcome your challenge.
You are who you are…but you can also choose who you become. And right now, methinks I’m on the right path for me.
Night night,
Barbara